Unwell and I've Had Enough

I haven't been out of the house in 7 days and am going stir crazy!  The husband managed to catch the flu working during a flu outbreak.  He was also taking prednisone at the time for gout.  Prednisone reduces your immunity so of course he's not aware of that and toddles off to work.  He's been sick for 10 days so far and I'm on day 7.  I actually thought I may be getting better but I can't shake this cough. 
I'm also having another troubling symptom that I'll probably need to see a Dr. about. the skin on my left side of my face is kind of numb.  It started feeling like there was a pimple there when I moved my face it hurt in a certain area.  Now the skin in numb to the touch.  It's probably just rosacea because I've noticed since I've been sick it's been flaring up.  So my face is extra red with little tiny pimples all over.  Yup it's a great look and one I try to cover very unsuccessfully with make-up which I'm horrible at applying in our dark bathroom.  Isn't growing old hard enough do I have to look like something out of a horror movie too?  I am so done with this that I'm ready to take some sand paper and just remove my skin entirely.  I have hated my skin since I was a young person.  I have this horrible oily skin that breaks out all the time no matter how old I am or what I eat or what I put on my skin.  I gave up on my skin years ago because nothing works.  I can't even put face cream on because every kind I've ever tried makes me break out.  And I have tried so many that I wish I had all the money back that I've wasted on that crap, I'd be rich!

Oh and I don't drink alcohol and rarely drink coffee, only eat chocolate every so often.  There is a huge list of things to avoid and I avoid them all and still my skin burns, goes flaming red and I break out.  If I'm not going to get any relief from giving up all the good stuff to eat and drink then what is the point?  I may as well go back to drinking coffee and eating more chocolate (I never was much of a drinker).  I can't even have a glass of wine or my face will be on fire after.

What did I ever do to deserve this scourge?  I'm mean really, I'm old fat and ugly do I need to be deformed and look like a monster too?  I've had enough!!!!  I really have. 

Comments

Birdie said…
The acne? It’s hormones, plain and simple. I had mine tested through a spit test and went on bio identical hormones based on those results and only get acne now when I forget to use the progesterone cream for a few days in a row. It’s not you. We have a pharmacy in our community that tests but you also have to get your doctor on board to sign off on the prescription. For me, the hot flashes were getting tobe too much and getting rid of the acne was a side benefit. Sadly, medical does not pay for any of it. If your husband has extended benefits through work and you can see a naturopath they will test and write a prescription. At any rate, it’s not you. It’s the hormones.

Thank you for your words on my blog. You are a light in my life and if you are ever on the island, let me know. I would love to meet you and have tea and
give you a hug. If you are on Facebook, send an email to birdeisblogging@hotmail.com
Sparkless said…
Thanks Birdie. What I have on my face is rosacea and Ive been to a Dr to diagnose it. I did do one treatment of laser to reduce the blood vessels of my face but for that to really help you need multiple treatments and I cant afford that. She also gave me some steroid cream that I am only supposed to use very sparingly because it will thin the skin which you would think would be a good thing because rosacea causes thickening of the skin. And she also gave me an antibiotic cream. They did seem to help but not really get rid of the redness. I could also try an oral antibiotic but I dont really want to do that so Im left with basically a flaming red face some days with tiny pimples. I dont have hot flashes, just lucky in something I guess. If I drink coffee or other hot beverages or alcohol or a whole list of things like spicy food it makes my face turn very red and burn like its on fire. Ill ask the Dr about having a hormone check but that would probably involve an expensive trip to Kelowna or Vancouver.
If I ever on on the Island I will let you know because Id love to get together and meet you.

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