Just a Little One

Is there such thing as a little lie?  My kids think there is and I have no idea where they got that idea.  I taught them to not hurt someones feelings was okay as long as you tried to stay as close to the truth as possible.  Like when someone asks you out to an event you have no interest in attending so you tell them you are busy that night and can't make it.  That kind of lie is the only lie I've told my kids was acceptable.  I'm sure there are other ones but why confuse kids with more than one?

The wonderful son has had his video games taken away from him for awhile now.  The husband and I only let him play them for a limited amount of time.  He can't seem to understand that he's addicted to them and will pretty much hole up in his bedroom playing games all day every day if we let him. We've talked to him calmly about why this is not a good thing etc, etc.  He agrees with us and then when we tell him his time is up on games and he needs to do something else he whines and fusses.  The rule is no whining or stalling or we will take games away and he won't get to play at all for the next day.

We keep all his game stuff in our bedroom in a box.  He knows where it is.  The husband looked in the box and found his DS (handheld game system) was missing.  The husband asks the son where the DS is and the son gives him a story about him leaving it at his friend's house.   The husband is suspicious and so am I.

The son has to go to a violin rehearsal so I check his room and backpack for the DS and of course I find it in his backpack.  Then when we confront him with his lie he continues to say he didn't know it was in there.  How stupid do you think we look?!  He know's we are more upset about lying than making mistakes.  He's 16 and he knows better.

Looks like we'll be not trusting his words now.  I have never been given a reason to suspect him before and now it starts.  I just wish he'd come clean and said he had it in his backpack.  Sure we would have been upset that he took it without permission but a lie is worse.  And a lie lasts longer cause now we'll be keeping a much closer eye on him and not always believing what he says.

So a lie stays active longer than a mistake.  A mistake you can forgive and get over but a lie is a big old stinking mess that can't be cleaned up properly and it sits there stinking for a very long time.   I know he's a teen and that's what teens do and I'm not going to get all bent out of joint about it but I'm disappointed in him again and that is a thing I've been feeling much to much of lately.  


Mama Pea said…
I realize this comment is no help at all, but I am so happy to be past that time of child raising! They say being a teenager is hard . . . but not as hard as being a parent!
Erin said…
Ah, I'm right in the throes of the "video game taking away" too! The kids (mostly Loch) is obsessed!!! I am going to be putting my foot down this summer for sure. I like that last bit about the lie lasting so much longer than a mistake - so true!
Sparkless said…
Mama Pea, but that does help. Just knowing that I'm not the only parent going or that has gone through this makes it much better. Thanks

Blogger is acting up and I can't seem to get any comments to post right now.
Sparkless said…
Um, okay now I see Erin's comment is posted. Wonder what is going on with Blogger?

Erin, stay strong!

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