Midlife Crisis?

I have just not been myself lately.  I want to up and run away from home.  Nothing in my life is the way I want it to be.  If I would have known I'd end up here I'd have gone a different way entirely.  But here I am and here I'm stuck so what to do?
I can't stay in bed all day and hope for oblivion, believe me I've tried.  I can't run away cause I've got kids and that wouldn't be fair to them.  I need something new, something fun, something interesting.  But for the life of me I can't figure out what that could be.
I figure I'm having a midlife crisis.  Make sure you don't have too many regrets or it's gonna hit you like a ton of bricks.  And it sucks, it really, really, really sucks.  Things that used to make me happy don't.  Places I used to like to go I don't want to go to anymore.  Nothing gives me peace or satisfaction anymore.  It's like my brain has decided it's bored and needs something but it's not smart enough to tell me what that something is.
I've tried being happy with my life as it is but my brain won't let me. It's annoying how a brain does what it wants no matter how hard you try to be in charge you are just a slave to your neurons.  I have plans, lots of plans but I just can't do them yet for one reason or another, usually the reason is money.  I'd love to put a couple of raised bed gardens in the back yard to grow some lettuce and other veggies in but I can't afford the lumber or soil.  I've looked around for something free that I could use but so far haven't found anything. 
What I'd really like to do is go live in a rustic cabin in the woods with no one around for a few weeks.  I'd like to have to haul my own water, bake my own bread, and pretty much get back to nature just for a little while.  It always seems that when people need a break or healing they turn to nature.  I'd love to give nature a shot at healing my midlife crisis.

Comments

Capital Mom said…
Maybe if you can't get away in nature for a few days you can escape there for a few hours?

Sorry you aren't happy. I hope you find a path to happiness.
MarmiteToasty said…
Jebus I SO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL......... we should run away together lol if anything we would have a laff....

x
Sparkless said…
Capital Mom, I did have a little getaway when the kids went to bed and the husband was on a night shift.

Marmite we would get in so much trouble if we ran away together, Thelma and Louise look out!!! LOL!

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