Meltdown

I'm having a melt down right now. I'm so fed up with everything. My life really, really, really, really sucks. I have a sheet for a wall, no privacy, no closet for my clothes, my clothes have to be kept in piles around my room cause there is stuff in front of my too small dresser. I sleep on a futon, I SLEEP ON A FREAKING FUTON!!!!!! My back is killing me. I can't move around without pain so I'm getting fatter. I didn't think it would be possible but it is, I'm getting fatter. We live in an absolute dump. I can't even get dressed in my own bedroom and have to get dressed in the bathroom every day. Everything in our house either doesn't work properly or is broken. We have no money and that stress alone is enough to give me anxiety attacks. My stupid husband is oblivious to the facts and lives his life in a fantasy land where only his wants and needs are ever met. I haven't had a hair cut in over a year. My hair really needs to be colored cause the gray is too much. My clothing has holes in them so I debate each day which pair of pants has the fewest holes and if I can somehow mend or cover them when I go out. I can't get my stupid computer to open a newsletter I took hours to finish on my laptop. I tried to connect the printer to my laptop and now it won't go online or shut down properly. It also couldn't find the drivers to load the printer. I can't go online to find the drivers cause it's not WORKING NOW!!! Oh, and I have a meeting with the board I'm on tonight, a very long meeting with a bunch of idiots.

I better go sit in the closet for a bit and suck my thumb, oh wait, I don't have a closet to sit in! Shit!
I'm afraid my head is going to explode if one little stupid horrible thing happens. No really, my head just might explode. I'm serious. If one person at this meeting says something stupid I just may explode. I don't know how I'm going to keep it together tonight. If you read in the paper about a woman who's head exloded while at a meeting, that was me.