Determined

I'm determined to take a good picture of my stupid cat. I've never got a single good shot of this cat. I blame it on the camera. This camera takes so long for the shutter to click that the cat always moves and the shot is blown. Then there's the torture we've inflicted on the kids over the last 5 years making them sit with contorted smiles on their faces for what seems like hours to them just to get one good picture which of course we never get.

I'm the mom who always goes to all her kids activities but never has a single good picture to show for it. I'm always way too far away or on the wrong side of the stage for taking pictures. The camera runs out of battery power or the lighting is bad. I'm so ready for a nice new camera.

Do you think anyone would notice if I just bought one of those nice new digital Canon cameras on my Sears card for $600? I don't have cash to buy anything but I've always got a credit card... I know it's a slippery slope but my kids are almost grown and I haven't got any good pictures of them and I'm getting a bit frantic about it.

My biggest fear is that I fork over the $600 and my pictures still suck! Ya, that would be about right for me. Does that ever happen to you? You figure your life is gonna be so much better if you just buy this or that and when you do it's not nearly as good or as satisfying as you'd thought it would be. Or worse the dang thing doesn't work as well as you thought it would. No? Well it always happens to me.

Take my bed for instance. My husband and I have been sleeping on a futon for 20 years! Yes, I know it's pretty shocking that people of our advanced ages are still sleeping on what most people consider a university student's bed. Every couple of years we buy a new piece of foam to make it softer. My back is killing me. It isn't so bad for my husband cause he's got shoulders and his head ends up being on the right angle for sleeping with his head higher than his legs. Me I've got hips and they don't sink into the mattress so I end up with my big hips and small shoulders making my head lower than my legs. This means indigestion is a possibility if I eat anything close to bedtime, not to mention the bad headaches I get and sinus pressure. I tried a bigger pillow but only got neck pain from that.

I'd buy a real bed but I've got this fear, this really really big fear that I'll go out and spend a fortune on a nice normal bed and then won't be able to sleep on it. Every time my husband rolls over the bed will move around unlike a hard old futon, waking me up and disturbing my sleep. And the softness will be so foreign to my body that I'll probably end up with a worse back problem.

I slept at my parents house last summer for a couple of days while the kids and I took care of their yard and house. I couldn't get comfortable in the bed it was just way too soft. If we lived in a large city I've be able to try out the beds but we live in a small town and no one sells mattresses except the Brick. I don't have a Brick credit card nor do I want one. I just want to have a normal sleep on a normal bed and not feel like a freak anymore.

P.S. I just spell checked this post and it said "no misspellings found." I'm suspicious cause I find spelling errors and typos in my posts all the time so I'm gonna check again just to be sure. If you find one don't tell me cause I don't want to know about it!

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